What I come from

I wanted to take this time to tell everyone a little bit about myself.  I’ve told people stories about my epilepsy, what type I have, how normal my life has been but no one really knows much about me or my background.  I think it’s important to know just so everyone can understand why I can deal with my epilepsy.

First of all my parents are immigrants, both come from Poland and came here when they were in their late 20’s.  They came from a country which at the time was under communistic rule from Russia and they really didn’t have a good life, nor did their futures seem any better.  They left Poland determined to make a life for themselves and future family.  Even though I wasn’t even a twinkle in the eye yet, they knew they would someday have a family.

Well they finally had their dream, a house, jobs (even though they were very hard), and a baby on the way which was myself.  My mom worked in a factory and literally worked there until her doctor forced her to go on maternity leave and my dad worked more than one job just to put food on the table.  He was also going to a county college because the education he had received in Poland was not worth anything here in America.  He worked at one full time job, a part time job pumping gas, and went to school on the nights he had off.

When my mom finally went into labor with me there were complications.  Not only was I premature (only by one month), but I was coming out feet first and the umbilical cord was wrapped around my neck causing me to almost choke myself.  Needless to say I was born and they found that even though they wanted to monitor me because I was premature most of my organs were in normal condition and I had an innocent heart murmur.

I had lots of health problems as a child, nothing too serious but I was severely anemic, I had severe eczema (try telling a little kid they can’t take bubble baths anymore), I was constantly getting sick and after my brother was born (who was colicky) I was rushed to the ER.  At the age of 6 I was rushed to the hospital because I was turning blue.  I was having an asthma attack and later found out I had pneumonia.  I was stuck in that lovely hospital bed during Christmas time for almost 2 weeks. 

After I was released from the hospital they put me on heavy medication, lots of nebulizer treatments I had to do 3 times a day, and that was time consuming.  Well from all of the medication the steroids and the antibiotics I had such bad night terrors that I started waking up in the middle of the night and I started hallucinating.  We went back to the doctor and they had to figure out what to do to get me better but not at the cost of me hallucinating.  Eventually it was resolved and life went back to normal.  Well I grew up and had to watch myself because of my asthma, eczema which eventually faded into only a few patches here and there and everything was normal.

I went through a lot of hospital visits growing up and doctors visits, but it wasn’t too bad after everything settled down.  Once I started growing up and going to school I was bullied.  My classmates were very cruel towards me, making fun of me every day from the day I moved to where I live now.  I was made fun of for being Polish, having a gap in between my two front teeth which now I laugh about because I probably did look pretty funny, but there were so many other things.  Just the little things that kids make fun of you for, your hair, your clothes, etc.  I most of the time just kept my mouth shut and took it all in.  Don’t get me wrong I cried like a little baby but I did it when no one was looking.  I didn’t want my parents being worried and they only knew about a few things that were said to me but not everything, I actually told them everything that was said and done to me in the past year.  The topic about bullying has become a trending topic so I finally opened up and told my parents what I had to go through.  They knew I was never part of the popular crowd and that I didn’t ever fit in completely but they didn’t know it was that bad.

I think I never fit in because my parents are Polish and I come from a Polish upbringing and culture so I was always different from all the other kids.

Once high school came it was not as bad as it used to be.  The teasing and bullying calmed down, but I started to become really self conscious and fell into an eating disorder.  I was almost 50 pounds less than what I am right now and I’m 5’9 so for me to be the size I was, was really bad.  I look back on it now and I was literally just skin and bones, at least now I have a figure.  Anyway I had the eating disorder until mid junior year.  That’s when I started kickboxing and soccer.  All the years before I was a ballerina but stopped that once school started.  I started kickboxing and soccer because I needed something to help me stay in shape.  Once I started these sports since they are very intense my body went into what I like to call shut down mode.

I became so tired that I could even stay awake for five minutes after a full nights rest.  Then I actually started to become hungry, I had not felt that in two years so it was a strange feeling.  Anyway to make this long story short I started eating right again.  Then I was diagnosed with epilepsy about 1 ½ years later.  So the stress started all over again, and the rest is history.

I come from an extremely great home, my parents are amazing and my brother grew up into a very remarkable young man.  I would say we did really well in our lives.  Even after all of these things that have happened in my life I still try to look on the bright side of things.  I used to be bitter but I’m not anymore, there is no point to be bitter.  It’s taken me quite some time to feel like this about life.  In closing I would like to say that there is hope and there is always someone willing to talk to you regardless of if it’s someone close to you or someone who is a complete stranger.  Be prepared for people to judge you no matter what but the people who won’t judge you and who will just listen are the ones that will give you the best advice.